A generous, loving religion allows you to free your parents/friends from hell.
The prominent religion of the region states that:
- The land was created by God as a gift to his people.
- If their flag is flying from (these few sacred sites), their citizens will have eternal life.
- The sacred sites aren't suitable for holding in a siege. They're easily accessed from all sides, difficult to fortify, and lack their own food / water supplies.
- If someone dies while they're loyal to a group who doesnt hold those points, they're sent to hell.
- When you capture all the places, all your recently deceased people in hell get released and get into heaven.
- I'd you're in heaven and your side loses control of the sacred ground, you can stay in heaven.
- Those who death was violent, or who killed others (including in self defense) do not get into heaven and will be in hell eternally.
This will result in armies armed with non lethal weapons, evicting near bloodlessly other armies from the sacred ground every few years.
Once you have held the sacred ground, the motivation for holding it goes down (No one is suffering. You only wish to prevent future suffering). If you haven't held it for a while, your motivation to seize it goes up (people you know are suffering). A motivated attacker and an unmotivated defender will change hands quickly.
Very few people will be willing to seize the castle by deadly force, as it excludes them from the reward of heaven. Most will attempt to fight non lethally, there'll be lots of capturing and exiling and imprisoning and then revolution and overthrowing.
Some may fight lethally (they dont believe that part of the religion, or are just fanatical). You're better off running away from them, letting them take the grounds and then sneaking up on them later with non lethal.
This should create an unstable map, different sides constantly gain motivation, gain ground, be unable to fortify it, lose motivation, and relinquish it.