People wonder how Santa can deliver all his presents in one night. It's, simple: he's a master time traveller. (This post will form the base of a long series of questions).
Here's how Santa's usual Christmas goes:
- Santa spends Christmas with his family
- After Christmas, all the presents are in all the homes
- Santa begins travelling backwards in time
- According to Norad, Santa's sleighs max speed is "faster than starlight". According to special relativity, this is equivalent to travelling backwards in time.
- Santa breaks into and steals the presents from a bunch of houses (this is logically necessary, since by the time he reaches the beginning of Christmas, there should be no presents in their homes).
- Since Santa is doing this in reverse, it's equivalent to him giving them presents.
- Once it hits the beginning of Christmas, he starts going forward in time again, and gives the presents he stole to different homes then he stole them from.
- Once he reaches the end of Christmas (having delivered all the presents he stole), he goes back to step 3.
- He is careful to never visit the same home twice.
At the beginning of Christmas, no homes have presents. At the end, all homes have presents. This is logically consistent because if
- If Santa visited your house going forward, you started with no presents at the beginning of Christmas, and Santa gave you presents, and then you had presents by the end.
- If Santa visited your house in reverse, you have presents during the end of Christmas, Santa in reverse stole them, and you have no presents at the beginning of Christmas.
Therefore, we do not have a paradox, yet.
To an outside observer, it appears that there are millions of santas and reverse santas (see One-electron universe).
- At the beginning of Christmas, millions of santas and reverse santas pair produce. Every santa and reverse santa is fully stocked with presents.
- The santas deliver presents to the children like normal.
- Reverse santas also deliver presents, although it appears that they are stealing presents, but in reverse.
- After Christmas, every santa annihilates with a reverse santa. They will do so with a different reverse santa then they were produced with.
- Actually, one of the reverse santas annihilates with the santa from last year, leaving one santa to become the santa for the year to come. This new santa will have the combined experiences of all the santas and reverse santas.
If it seems confusing, it's because it is.
My question is, how does Santa avoid running into himself or otherwise causing temporal paradoxes. Given how many times he has to go forward and back, it seems likely that he could cause a temporal paradox if he is not careful.