Through some electronic interference breaking the casual flow of time, a samurai in feudal Japan, lets call him Mada Mada, receives visions of game streams bounced around by Starlink satallites to arrive in his dreams 500 years before they happen. Mada Mada especially took an interest in footage of a fighting game called Tekken, he found the demonic samurai Yoshimitsu especially inspiring. This character has a move in which he impales himself, with his katana in his belly, piercing through his own body to reach the opponent behind him. If succesful Yoshimitsu is often victorious.

Mada Mada wants to best all of his opponents and wants to master this move. Although he is couragious enough, he'd like this move to not be just a one time use. Therefore he goes to a surgeon to make a hole in his body where his katana can pass through. Mada Mada ofcourse will kill the surgeon after, so this trick move stays a secret.

While passing out from the sedatives during the surgery, Mada Mada actually wonders, where this hole can safely be made as to not restrict him in his swordfighting and not damage(kill) him.

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    $\begingroup$ I don't know about you, but I'd say that unless you have a pretty long sword, your back would have to be pretty close to your enemy, to the point that, for this to work as intended, you'd need to risk having to keep your back to your opponent and being pretty much within literal back-stabbing range every time you pull out this trick. It would make more sense if instead of a sword he planned on using a gun. $\endgroup$ May 24, 2021 at 12:22
  • $\begingroup$ @ProjectApex Even in a gun duel, your shot might very well miss because you don't know where your opponent actually is (they won't stay still!) and you fire at a very uncomfortable angle. A way to know how hard it is is to take a camera and try shooting some pictures behind you and see where each picture's center land. The results will be blurry and funny at the same time ^^'. $\endgroup$ May 24, 2021 at 14:12
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    $\begingroup$ @Tortliena I know right? But still, it's safer to use a gun (even with tremendous chances of missing) than to face your back to the enemy and hope he won't react to you stabbing him though your own back without retaliating, which isn't something you'd expect unless you're fighting someone with a very, very strict moral code. $\endgroup$ May 24, 2021 at 14:17

3 Answers 3

  • Not fully through the abdomen: all the core muscles work there, and they are essential in giving strength to any movement. Moreover, there are a lot of organs which do not exactly like to be pierced through, usually resulting in a painful death when that happens
  • Not through the limbs: it's a bit inconvenient to limit the mobility of the limbs for a fight, else why would people restrain other people to limit their capability to offend?

The only option might be, if this samurai has a large amount of abdominal fat, to have the passage be open through the adipose tissue on the side.

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In the man on the left of the image, it would be in the fat tissue you can see around the abdomen, next to his arms.

In that way the opening for the sword to go through would not damage any organ nor muscle. Though an obese samurai might have other issues in a fight.


The ragged samouraï

You don't actually need to perform a surgery that could cripple your fighting ability to get this trick out. Simply take wide, ample clothings to make you look like you're fatter and heavier than you actually are, at least from behind.

Then, as you'd expect, strike in your clothes and near your body, at or a little below your abdomen level : The natural motion of your sword should land approximately where you want, and it should be relatively easy enough to pull out. Since you have wide clothes and you make a pierce attack, it should be hard enough to react and parry it.

To expand on this illusion, you can add some skeleton structure (like side hoops used for old 18th's skirts and dresses) so that you don't need to add many layers which would decrease your trick's power, slow down your samouraï and make them sweat like they're santa's in a sauna. Just be sure to not hit the structure, or you'll miss miserably!

However, there is a big hole in your technic

Taking under the rule of cool that katanas are more designed to cut than to pierce, know that this tactic most probably won't work most of the time, and making it as a main, "ultimate" technic is really not a good idea. Let's review the use cases :

  • Battlefield : It's a little bit chaotic, people are moving a lot around, if you make this move, you'd have a low chance of hitting someone, or at least lethally (remember that they wear armor which can deflect blows). And if you do hit someone, it could be your friend, so...
  • Duels : You never, ever turn your back to your opponent. By the time you turn, and make your move, you will first lose track of the other duelist so you can't aim. Moreover your threatening range will be divided basically by three : First because you have to get through your own body, then you don't gain your arm's length range, and finally you do an underhanded attack, which by biomechanics principles has a lower range to the head, hands and torso. In other words, you let your enemy get a free, happy hit :).
  • Assassination (that's not very honorful :p) : It's the most plausible way of doing it, technically. Indeed, one might be really close to you without moving away or sideways. The problem is why would they be near you while you have your weapon drawn towards yourself? I doubt that they'll be saying sweet words in your ears while you fake committing suicide, and if they prevent you from killing yourself (like trying to take your arms up in a rush), they're most probably friendlies, not a target.

Without a clear use case where it's a winning move, it's probably as weak as it sounds cool on paper :/. However, Mada Mada's school of the crane's back-kick is not over yet, as long as you adapt it a little :

First, you will have a better chance with ranged weapons, like throwing knifes, handguns or other small contraptions, as they will drastically extend your threatening range. Then, don't make it as your main tool, it's a little bit too much of a one-trick poney move. However, as a side dish to your training, for very specific cases where you can take its strength from -The surprise effect-, it can have some uses.

For instance, you should have a lot easier time escaping if you assassinate someone in a crowd or on the road; Not many people will think that the guy looking away was the one who threw the knife. It could also work as an unhonourable first strike before a duel start, or to quickly cover your back in a corridor or on a small bridge, where you know people can't really dodge their way out.

This and a little "so cool!" magic to power it up should be able to make it a more viable technic.


No hole, but remove a kidney

The body is packed with vital stuff. Even if you manage to create the hole through your body, you need great accuracy and power to manage hitting the hole straight on and piercing any armour and the opponents. That is why it is probably better to ignore the hole and remove a kidney instead.

Stabbing yourself at a kidney will still hit vital organs besides the kidney, but it is be survivable in the right conditions. The important part is to have no kidney. There is a redundant one, so you'll live, but if the kidney is there you bleed out in record time. With the kidney removed safely, you'll have a chance. At that height on your body you also have enough power in your arms for the stab and are still likely to hit something vital in the opponent.

Side note: it is a next to useless move. There will be very, very, very, very little moments this move would ever be better than another, even used in complete surprise of your enemy.

  • $\begingroup$ Is removing a kidney (without killing the patient) even a viable medical procedure in the period? As far as I'm aware, the first documented case was in the 1800s. $\endgroup$ May 24, 2021 at 13:40
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    $\begingroup$ @RutherRendommeleigh probably not. I think it has a chance of success, but wouldn't count on it. But making a hole straight through a person and then making sure to maintain it without it growing close or infection doesn't seem plausible either. With an implausible scenario an implausible answer might still be correct. I suggested this as I feel it's less implausible than the hole. $\endgroup$
    – Trioxidane
    May 24, 2021 at 13:57

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