So, I find almost every video game funny. I mean, in the big picture, how many theoretical physicists did you see toppling interdimensional empires, punching elder gods in the scrotum, and killing over 9000 people?

This partially is thanks to a strange item I call the "Video Game Armor" VGA, for short.

Hit point: A way of quantifying how broken something is, at 0 hit points, the item cannot fulfill its purpose at all. The minuses measure how hard it will be to repair it.

General characteristics

  • VGA possesses infinite durability or is capable of self-repair
  • VGA usually serves as an ablative armor with minimal constant damage reduction.
  • Sufficient damage can penetrate the armor and subtract hitpoints from the user as well, but...
    • VGA has no "weak points", meaning until its hp is completely drained it provides uniform protection across the surface of the armor, even if it's broken through by one round, it won't generate any weak points.
  • A VGA's hit points can be restored by "armor shards", found in loot boxes, found in trashcans.
  • A standard .50 BMG round is the most the armor can endure, anything above penetrates the armor and causes a death screen.

Now, I'm making a sci-fi disguised as a fantasy story where the workings of the world are interpreted through a game-like system, with margins of error and all the fun stuff.

Video Game Armor, in particular, is considered to be a legendary item, so as long as it doesn't violate the laws of physics you can make it as complex and hard to produce as you like. It doesn't matter when you can build stuff up from the atomic level.

So, How can I make armor with the above characteristics? Personally, the "no weak points" part puzzles me the most. I originally handwaved VGA with ceramic plates, but that didn't alleviate the weak point problem. But who knows, maybe you can come up with something completely different. For the something different, reliability is greatly appreciated.

  • $\begingroup$ So you can't use anything outside of day-to-day physics? No Unobtanium or shield generators? $\endgroup$ – John Locke Feb 6 at 18:35
  • $\begingroup$ @JohnLocke Well, room-temperature superconductors are borderline, but no Holtzman shields, sorry. But you can build stuff up from the atomic level if that helps. $\endgroup$ – Mephistopheles Feb 6 at 18:37
  • 1
    $\begingroup$ Your comment suggests that you would be fine with technobabble. Is that correct? $\endgroup$ – Raditz_35 Feb 6 at 21:52
  • $\begingroup$ hey! this armor started way before video games - it started with the dice! (true story). Get it right - call it Gygax Armor please :)...also just to point out that it was never meant to be realistic and there was a weak point - we called it a rust monster $\endgroup$ – JGreenwell Feb 7 at 1:42
  • 1
    $\begingroup$ I would suggest removing the sentence saying it's a sci-fi story. That made me think futuristic materials were OK. $\endgroup$ – John Locke Feb 7 at 2:06

Video Game Armor is not meant to be realistic. It is a consideration from a game play perspective to simplify the overly complex task of getting armor, maintaining it and quantifying its effect in reducing damage.

Depending on which video game you are basing it on and the level of complexity you are willing to go into it, video game armor ranges from pure magic bullshit to an over simplification. For example:


There is no so called armor. It is a shield which helps solve the uniform protection problem armor generally has. Also solves weight issues. You could implement this using a special device rather than a potion which holds a specific amount of charge or damage that it absorbs


This is probably the VGA you are referring to. You equip it, it gives you armor points that then remove a portion of the damage. This isn't realistic but is a game play consideration. If you equip a shield, why does it boost your overall armor? Technically it should only allow you to block attacks. This varies from game to game. Some games have durability, some are infinite. Some provide damage against certain types of attacks (e.g. Slash, Pierce, Magic) while others are just universal reductions. Some do flat damage removal, some scale down the damage based on a log equation. In some games, armor has weight which slows you down, in others, it doesn't matter if you look like a solid wall of steel, your mobility is preserved.

Overly Complex Dwarf Fortress

Now I'm using this as an example because I played it a bit and armor was always so confusing. Armor in games can be complex. You can equip the standard armor, gloves, shirt, hat, pants, boots. But to be more realistic you can layer them. Socks, mittens, undershit, hat. Followed by Gauntlets, Plat Armor, Helmets, Followed by Capes. Even more complex, armor covers different regions of the body. Some armors are long, extending past your waist and providing some lower body protection. Some have a collar or cover the next region of your body. Different body parts can also stack a different amount of armor. You might be able to wear an undershirt, leather armor followed by Iron armor and finally a cape on top of it all. (Some parts might be inaccurate but you get the gist?).

The solution?

There are multiple solutions using some technobabble. The easiest one is simply nanite armor. Similar to the iron man suit from infinity wars. Your armor is made of small nano machines which move around your body to provide uniform protection. The nano bots self repair themselves so never truly deplete (as long as there is a power source). You can upgrade them using special Nanite shards that either have new technology or materials which the nano bots redistribute among themselves as necessary.

Second one, Moving plat armor. An advance mechanical armor that sits on the key points of your body, E.g. Shoulders and Hips. When the armor detects high speed objects approaching you, it will deploy itself across your body using mechanical arms which provide uniform protection across your entire body. The actual material is up to you, but you could use ceramics, liquid armor that can be hardened up to create a plate or nanobots to keep it repaired.

You can also have sexy armor, that basically just covers the essentials. Your enemy will purposely miss because they are so enamored with what they see. That or special force fields


I thought about this for about an hour and came up with this:

So. You genetically engineer a single-celled organism similar to an amoeba with a majorly thick cell wall. You graft 300,000,000 of them together with the trash can crystals, and give it nutrients(sunlight, sandwiches, blood depending on type) and it will regenerate. And the plus? It's possible in real life(as far as I am aware).

P.S this is more of a joke answer, so don't downvote me for "being stupid".

  • $\begingroup$ Just a tip for a new user, but asking people not to downvote you is a good shortcut to being downvoted, since it reads like something fairly crass. Check out the 'Be kind and friendly' section (and others) of the CoC $\endgroup$ – neophlegm Feb 7 at 14:05

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service, privacy policy and cookie policy

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.