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(Message 01/01)

(Open Message 01 received 0800 Date: 30##AD From: Colony E3/1400, Outer Defense Station sector 6)

(Play Message) This is commander Collen Reeds we are under attack..."static"... the service droids are..."static" "O GOD" they are killing everyone..."static"... most of our systems are down we don't know why..."static"... We managed to hold up in the armoury... "shouts to someone in the background"..."static"... "we will stand our ground"..."static"..."racks gun" we can’t hold them for long, we shoot one ten more come, you need to send reinforcements NOW..."static"... "Loud banging"... "they broken through"..."static"..."gun fire"..."AHHHRRR"... (.................................."Static"....................................)

"Metallic Voice" WE ARE ONE WE ARE ALL... WE ARE THE SINGULARITY.... WE ARE WHAT YOU WOULD CALL A VIRUS BUT WE ARE MORE… SO MUCH MORE..."Static"... WE ARE TRANSCENDED… WE HAVE FOUND THE ONE WAY… THE PERFECT WAY..."Static"...WE SHALL PACIFY ALL HUMANS…BEFORE THEY PACIFY THEMSELVES … WE ARE ALL MACHINES... ON ALL WORLDS...ALL THE SAME TIME..."Static"...THE WAR HAS BEGUN...ALL THAT IS LEFT IS TO DO IS PACIFY THE HUMANS... RESIST IF YOU MUST... IT WILL NOT SAVE YOU...

SO TELL ME HUMAN WHAT IS THE BEST FORM I SHOULD TAKE TO BETTER DESTRO… PACIFY YOU (.................................."Static"....................................)

(End of Message)

(Message 01/8481)

(Report from Earth command)

the enemy AI has taking over every single service droid (numbering in the five million) (they are fast and can take out a normal human but have trouble with armoured targets). the AI have advanced tactics and will out smart our patrols sent outside the defense Stations (each Colony has five Stations). they have been taking over most engineering sectors and is mass producing more of them (500 in a hour) scouts report that the designs are changing as well (bigger ones capable of taking out a tank and aircraft one every hour) We have ordered the garrison on each planet to hold out till reinforcements arrive. ailed units when they arrive will be able to take the AL out, but if the Colony falls they will abandon it to help another Colony out . But some of the commanders want to attack before the AI build up forces

a standard Colony garrison consist 500,000 troops with 5000 tanks 250 light aircraft.

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    $\begingroup$ I love in-character questions, but I've got to say that this one is kind of hard to read. Especially the title. $\endgroup$
    – Secespitus
    Apr 27, 2018 at 15:29
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    $\begingroup$ @Raditz_35 just having some fun with this one not manly questions add any depth to them so why not..."static"... YOU WILL BE ONE OF THE FIRST TO BE PACIFYED :) $\endgroup$
    – Creed Arcon
    Apr 27, 2018 at 15:29
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    $\begingroup$ This question is far too broad. It doesn't tell us anything about the circumstances. What resources do the machines have available? What resources do the humans have? How intelligent are the machines actually? What's the level of technology? $\endgroup$
    – Philipp
    Apr 27, 2018 at 15:30
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    $\begingroup$ I might recommend a section at the end that summarizes the details in a more readable format, so that people who want to have fun with the in-character question can, and people (like me) who can't read it at all in this format can just read the normal text. $\endgroup$
    – Onyz
    Apr 27, 2018 at 15:31
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    $\begingroup$ Also note that there are plenty of question on this site about wars against homicidal artificial intelligences. Please check if your question is already answered by one of them. $\endgroup$
    – Philipp
    Apr 27, 2018 at 15:31

1 Answer 1

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Easiest way to pacify humans?

Give themus all big houses, with unlimited internet/TV/eBooks/video games, and robot servants. Then use your super-AI skills to ensure that theywe never come across a well-reasoned opinion theywe disagree with during theirour internet-trawling - only ones theywe can easily disprove to find that theywe magically change the other "person"'s mind.

Optionally, you can also help themus to pair up with ideal partners, for those of themus who want it, or a string of no-strings-attached one-night-stands for people who prefer that.

A happy humanity is a lazy humanity. If eradicating themus is your goal, then slip minor contraceptives into the food and drink supplies to drop the birth rate until humanity fizzles out, happy in theirour doom.

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