I have a vampire. Said vampire would like a drink. But they're bored of their wine and their raw blood, and they'd like to try something more processed. You only die once, after all.

Now, blood doesn't have soda's consistency. It's non-Newtonian fluid — specifically, thixotropic, shear-thinning fluid. Ergo, pouring it is fine — it becomes more liquid when poured. The problem is that leaving it to sit for a while tends to see it clot and thicken. Production of blood serum involves removal of its clotting factors, which I imagine reduces some of that. The sources I can access indicate physical properties of red blood cells themselves are also partially responsible for the rheology of blood, but if you remove those some of the flavor goes with and the vampire doesn't appreciate that. So we've done the best we can in the "ensuring the drink won't become blood Jello" (oooh, there's an idea) department. Sterilizing it with radiation and chilling it post-canning will deal with any microorganisms trying to snack on it from the inside; only one blood-consuming parasite is allowed to have this drink, thank you very much.

However, the vampire would like their drink carbonated, like the sodas those silly living people enjoy. And therein lies the rub: is this possible? Normally one would think this straightforward: carbonation is the injection of carbon dioxide into a fluid to give it fizzy bubbles, so inject carbon dioxide into the blood, easy-said-done. But I have no idea how carbon dioxide would behave within serum as opposed to water. Moreover, I once had a home soda maker, and its manual specifically said not to use it with fluids other than water because they might gum up its internals.

So there's the question: can a vampire carbonate serum to produce a sort of blood soda, preferably without making some kind of awful, goopy mess or thin, flavorless sparkling water out of it?

Don't worry about it interacting with the flavoring or anything along those lines; let's just say it's not sweetener and leave it at that.

I have a vampire. Said vampire would like a drink. But they're bored of their wine and their raw blood, and they'd like to try something more processed. You only die once, after all.

Now, blood doesn't have soda's consistency. It's non-Newtonian fluid — specifically, thixotropic, shear-thinning fluid. Ergo, pouring it is fine — it becomes more liquid when poured. The problem is that leaving it to sit for a while tends to see it clot and thicken. Production of blood serum involves removal of its clotting factors, which I imagine reduces some of that. The sources I can access indicate physical properties of red blood cells themselves are also partially responsible for the rheology of blood, but if you remove those some of the flavor goes with and the vampire doesn't appreciate that. So we've done the best we can in the "ensuring the drink won't become blood Jello" (oooh, there's an idea) department. Sterilizing it with radiation and chilling it post-canning will deal with any microorganisms trying to snack on it from the inside; only one blood-consuming parasite is allowed to have this drink, thank you very much.

However, the vampire would like their drink carbonated, like the sodas those silly living people enjoy. And therein lies the rub: is this possible? Normally one would think this straightforward: carbonation is the injection of carbon dioxide into a fluid to give it fizzy bubbles, so inject carbon dioxide into the blood, easy-said-done. But I have no idea how carbon dioxide would behave within serum as opposed to water. Moreover, I once had a home soda maker, and its manual specifically said not to use it with fluids other than water because they might gum up its internals.

So there's the question: can a vampire carbonate serum to produce a sort of blood soda, preferably without making some kind of awful, goopy mess or thin, flavorless sparkling water out of it?

Don't worry about it interacting with the flavoring or anything along those lines; let's just say it's not sweetener and leave it at that.